And she just kept walking
by Recca
Summary: The spider-head crisis has been overcome, but what will Nazuna Do now? And can she handle the struggle within her own mind?


And She Just Kept Walking

An Inu-Yasha Fanfic by Recca_kun

Stupid Disclaimer: I don't own Inu-Yasha Blah blah blah. 

= Flashback

Kagome and Inu-Yasha were arguing yet again. It seemed they were talking about some sort of secret… something about a new moon or whatnot. Only moments before, her world had ended when she found that her master, who had taken her in and raised her himself, was the leader of the Spider-Head demons who killed her father. All seemed lost until Inu-Yasha had shown up.

"I guess Demons aren't so bad after all…" Thought Nazuna. She sat at the waters' edge and watched their boat sail away. It seemed to float off of the water, and ride on the waves of the sunset until it became a mere speck in the distance. Nazuna sat up, dusted herself off, and set off for home.

But suddenly, Nazuna froze dead in her tracks. "Home?" she thought. "Where am I supposed to go now?" She had no home. She had no family or friends. Where would she go…? Where would she go…?

Should you have no place to go, feel free to stay at the temple.

She recalled the soft, ancient voice of the seemingly kindly old monk, on the day her father died. "Damn him…" Cursed Nazuna. It was he who had put her in this position in the first place. It was he who had caused her to suffer more than she had ever suffered her entire life. And it was he who had left her alone now. 

Nazuna spat at the disgusting thought. "How can I _miss_ him?" she thought aloud. He had tried to kill her, after all. But still… there was something inside her that missed him. The same "something" that was inside her was also still attempting to persuade her that her master was not a spider demon, that he had been cursed or possessed. "By that demon!" she proclaimed. "He did this! He made the master turn against me! It was him! That dog demon!"

__

Resorting to blame, are we?

Rang her inner monologue.

"Shut up!" Screamed Nazuna, clutching her head. Tears began to flow down her eyes in rivulets. "It wasn't him! It couldn't be! He took care of me! If he hated me, why would he bother raising me? There has to be an explanation!"

__

There is. He tricked us.

"SHUT UP!" screamed Nazuna once again. "It can't be his fault! It has to be that Dog Demon! I _knew _he couldn't be trusted."

__

You misunderstand. I never said it was his fault.

"Then please tell me what you're talking about!"

__

The simple answer is that it's nobody's fault. He became a demon of his own will. I don't believe he hated us. But I do believe his greed was stronger then his love for us. That was his downfall.

"His love for…us?" Nazuna repeated. "What do you mean, 'us?' Who are you?"

__

I am you. I am the voice in your mind that speaks only truth. And If I know the truth, you must know it as well. That is why, although you try to convince yourself otherwise, deep down, you know the old monk was not the man you thought he was. You know this because I know, as I am you. That is why you cry right now. Because you cannot deny it.

Nazuna dropped to her knees in acceptance. Her crying had been reduced to a sniffle. There wasn't much else she could do at this point. She stood up, and thought about her options. After thinking for a while, she settled her gaze to the old temple.

"Could I rebuild it?" She wondered. She might be able to clear out the bodies of the dead "spider-heads" and start her life there. She could watch over the graves that her dear caretaker watched over, and make things right this time.

But she knew she couldn't. There would be too many bad memories to haunt her, too many nagging voices trying once again to persuade her that the monk never was a demon. She couldn't go back to her old life ever again. The sad truth was that she had no option other than to start all over again. 

But where would she go now? To where would the road take her? She had no one. Who would look after her.

__

Maybe it isn't necessary.

"Maybe what isn't necessary?"

A caretaker. We handled that crisis pretty well considering the circumstances, didn't we?

Nazuna's brow furrowed. "What are you suggesting?"

__

I'm saying we don't necessarily NEED anyone. We can do this ourselves. Let's just walk. Let's see where the road will take us next. After all, the only certainty in life is that there are no certainties. 

Nazuna thought about this. She'd had structure her whole life. Could she possibly live without it? Can she handle this herself? She really was still a child in the grand scheme of things. How could she?

"Let's… just walk…" She repeated. "I like the sound of that!" 

She turned to the sunset, and looked at the setting sun.

"Inu-Yasha…" she said to herself. "I'd like to meet him again…" (of course if she did, she'd never admit it.) 

She looked to the road ahead of her… And she just kept walking.

Authors Notes:

I've wanted to do this fic for a loooooooooong time now, and I'm glad I finally got around to doing it. (And I hope you are, too!) Anywho, The "Only certainty in life is that there are no certainties" Was from FF9, I believe an Armarant quote. Please Review, no flames please, but Constructive Criticism is more than welcome. 

Arigato to Ja ne! (^_^)


End file.
